“True freedom is when all the stories, all the insights, all the realizations, concepts, beliefs and positions dissolve. What remains is what you are; a vast, conscious, luminous space simply resting in itself, not knowing a thing, at the point where all things are possible.”
--Enza Vita
“As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being. It may even be assumed that just as the unconscious affects us, so the increase in our consciousness affects the unconscious.”
--C.G. Jung, from Memories, Dreams, and Reflections
“The individual is an aperture through which the whole energy of the universe is aware of itself, a vortex of vibrations in which it realizes itself as man or beast, flower or star—not alone, but as central to all that surrounds it.”
--Alan Watts
“Everything is energy and that's all there is to it. Match the frequency of the reality you want and you cannot help but get that reality.”
--Albert Einstein
Arrested and locked up in various concentration camps, Alojzy Pawłowski was forced to spend a total of five years of his life in prison simply because he was gay.
When we look back in time for this LGBT History Month, it is easy for the sheer scale of persecution to reduce its victims to numbers. But behind those numbers were individual lives—gay men and women with families, friendships, hopes, careers, loves, and stories of their own. So many of those stories were never recorded, were deliberately and maliciously erased, or disappeared with the people who lived them. Remembering people like Alojzy Pawłowski allows us to restore, from our own moment in history, some measure of the individuality and humanity that was so savagely denied to them in their lifetimes.
From Arolsen Archives at the International Center on Nazi Persecution:
Alojzy Pawłowski was born in Soły (Ashmyany district/Vilnius Voivodeship) in 1918.He was a Polish national, a Catholic, and a nurse by profession. At 22 years of age, he was sentenced to two years in prison for fornication with men, similar to his partner Jan Ratajczak.
It is written in the ruling: “Defendant 1 [Pawłowski] was employed as an auxiliary nurse from August 30, 1939, until May 28, 1940, […] at the city hospital in Poznań. In May 1940, he met defendant 2 [Ratjczak] at the hospital, who had been admitted there at the end of April with a foot injury. Without first alluding to his intentions in conversation, he lay down in bed with defendant 2 one night around the middle of May. He gripped defendant 2’s genitals, held his own against them, and played until […] he became stiff and ejaculation took place.”
Special Court I of Poznań declared: “The term fornication in Paragraph 175 of the German Criminal Code (StGB) comprises not only coitus-like acts between men, but also any abuse of the body of another person of the same sex for sensual pleasure. As expressly determined by the law, the man who allows himself to be abused by another man for fornication is equal to the man who commits fornication with him. These elements of the crime are present in all three cases.”
Alojzy was also convicted based on Paragraph 174/3 and was considered the seducer: “It was to be taken into account during sentencing that the defendant [Pawłowski] acted as the seducer, and has a proclivity towards perverted fornication. He was therefore not allowed any mitigating circumstances. […] However, it was to be taken into account for the defendant [Ratajczak] that he was seduced into performing the act by the defendant [Pawłowski].”
He served his sentence in Poznań prison and, from August 9, 1940, in Rawicz penitentiary. He was moved to Rawicz prison camp in 1942. He was due to be released in June 1943, but the Gestapo took over.
In August 1942, Alojzy wrote a letter to his aunt, Maria Jankowska. He was curious as to whether his family was in good health. In this text, the censor at Rawicz underlined just a couple of sentences: “[Aunt], you have told me that you have spoken to Edward and that he recently got married. Thank you very much for the greetings, and I ask that you send a short note from me.” That was the last letter between Alojzy and his family. It is not known who Edward was, but Alojzy was once again punished due to this fragment of text.
In August 1943, the Gestapo transported him to Auschwitz concentration camp where he was assigned prisoner number 136627. One year later, he was taken to Ravensbrück concentration camp – then to Mittelbau-Dora concentration camp and Bergen-Belsen concentration camp, where he was freed.
Alojzy Pawłowski returned to Poland after the war and lived in Ustka. He wrote two letters to the Arolsen Archives, one in 1973 and another in 1984. He needed some kind of evidence that he had been a concentration camp prisoner in order to receive a pension.
A guest article by Joanna Ostrowska. The biography of Alojzy comes from her book “Oni. Homoseksualiści w czasie II wojny światowej” (Warsaw 2021).
Interior designer Jay Jeffers designed a coastal home with ocean views in Corona del Mar, Southern California and did not use a single trope of "seaside design" (no blue-and-white, no sand color, no starfish or shells, thank god!). Instead, his clients said they wanted a sense of "’90s Tom Ford-era Gucci." He created a space of deeper color, texture, and interest ... a home far more engaging than a traditional "coastal" design would have provided. I love the living room with its mix of materials (the different woods on the walls and on the coffee table, along with the dark stone of the wide hearth seat) and those sculptural moments in the form of a floor lamp (right) and skeletal chair (left). The large faceted lights over the dining table (with the bookmatched stone kitchen backsplash in the background) are knockouts, the bedroom is sexy and alluring, and I love the pink Murano glass fixture over the tub in the bathroom! These gorgeous photos by Sam Frost appeared in LUXE.
It was so fun to discover that two cities in my own backyard (and the two cities I spend most of my time in) are on the list for highest-ranked cities in the world!
San Francisco landed at #5 and San Jose at #8 among cities around the world in Oxford Economics’ 2026 Global Cities Index, which compares 1,000 cities across the metrics of Economics, Human Capital, Quality of Life, Environment, and Governance.
“The idea of Zen is to catch life as it flows. There is nothing extraordinary or mysterious about Zen. I raise my hand; I take a book from the other side of the desk; I hear the boys playing ball outside my window; I see the clouds blown away beyond the neighboring wood — in all these I am practicing Zen, I am living Zen. No wordy discussion is necessary, nor any explanation … When the sun rises the whole world dances with joy and everybody’s heart is filled with bliss. If Zen is at all conceivable, it must be taken hold of here.”
--D.T. Suzuki
"The goal of meditation is not to kill all feelings and become anesthetized to the pain and fear of others, nor our own. Zen frees us to scream loudly and fully when it is time to scream.”
—Unknown
"A samurai once asked Zen Master Hakuin where he would go after he died. Hakuin answered, 'How am I supposed to know?'
'How do you know? You're a Zen master!' exclaimed the samurai.
'Yes, but not a dead one,' Hakuin answered."
--Zen Mondo
LGBT History Month provides role models, builds community, and represents a civil rights statement about the contributions to the world of the LGBTQ+ community. You'd think we would be in a better place for LGBT rights by 2026 (as well as rights for women and POC, etc. etc....), but here we are with physical attacks on the community increasing at alarming rates, thanks to the current administration of darkness. Roughly 791 anti-LGBTQ bills have been introduced (435 of those bills specifically targeted transgender people), with 50 bills actually being enacted and passed into law in the United States in 2026 — better than last year's total of 109 bills enacted into law out of 1,061 bills introduced according to the LGBTQ+ Legislation Tracking Project. But unfortunately, we still have another 3 months to go to see how much more damage can be done.
The Human Rights Campaign says, "These laws are fueled by an anti-LGBTQ+ Republican establishment — and coordinated, well-funded extremist groups like the Alliance Defending Freedom, Heritage Foundation and the Family Policy Alliance — insistent on trying to control our families and lives." For this reason, it is of grave importance to promote visibility, which engenders understanding and empathy. When people know someone who is LGBTQ, they are far more likely to support equality under the law. But beyond that, our stories can be powerful and empowering to each other, inspiring change.
How It Works
LGBT History Month celebrates the achievements of 31 lesbian, gay, bisexual or transgender Icons. Each day in October, a new LGBT Icon is featured with a video, bio, bibliography, downloadable images and other resources. Visit the link at the bottom of this post. There are some wonderful, legendary artists and figures on this year's list.
Background
In 1994, Rodney Wilson, a Missouri high school teacher, believed a month should be dedicated to the celebration and teaching of gay and lesbian history, and gathered other teachers and community leaders. They selected October because public schools are in session and existing traditions, such as Coming Out Day (October 11), occur that month.
Gay and Lesbian History Month was endorsed by GLAAD, the Human Rights Campaign, the National Gay and Lesbian Task Force, the National Education Association and other national organizations. In 2006 Equality Forum assumed responsibility for providing content, promotion and resources for LGBT History Month.
Celebrate Our Heritage
The LGBT community is the only community worldwide that is not taught its history at home, in public schools or in religious institutions. LGBT History Month provides role models, builds community and makes the civil rights statement about our extraordinary national and international contributions.
Shortly after sunset this evening, look low in the eastern horizon and you will see a large and golden-hued moon ... with Saturn shining brightly bright next to it.
Cassandra Wilson died this month, September 1st ... thanks for the music Cassandra! R.I.P.
Today, on California Native American Day, I am taking a moment to recognize and honor the Native peoples of California: their history, cultures, their resilience, their continuing contributions to this place, which we call home. It's worth remembering how this started.
In 1939, the state first set aside October 1st for what was then called "Indian Day." In 1968, after tribal leaders pushed for broader recognition, the fourth Friday in September became American Indian Day, and in 2014, Governor Jerry Brown formally established the day into state law as California Native American Day. Behind those dates, of course, is a much longer, deeper history. Native peoples lived on and cared for this land for thousands of years, building rich cultures, languages, communities. History also holds painful truths like displacement, and the attempts to erase cultures and languages.
California Native American Day can't undo that history, but it can serve as a reminder of something basic and important. Native peoples deserve to have their stories told truthfully. Their culture treated with dignity. Their traditions respected and their voices heard. They're not a footnote in California's past. Native communities are a vital, living part of California now. So today is a day to pause, acknowledge, and to honor what has endured and what continues to enrich this state.
“We cannot deeply love anything without becoming vulnerable to loss, and we cannot become separate people, responsible people, connected people, reflective people without some losing and leaving and letting go.”
--Joan Didion
“Things falling apart is a kind of testing and also a kind of healing. We think that the point is to pass the test or to overcome the problem, but the truth is that things don’t really get solved. They come together and they fall apart. Then they come together again and fall apart again. It’s just like that. The healing comes from letting there be room for all of this to happen: room for grief, for relief, for misery, for joy.”
--Pema Chödrön, from “When Things Fall Apart”
Today is the official start of autumn, when our planet begins to tilt the other direction, tipping the northern hemisphere away from the sun. The days grow shorter and the nights grow longer as we move indoors and into ourselves for hibernation and introspection. Autumn is a time of harvest as the earth moves into hibernation as well. It is a beautiful time, a spiritual transition, a doorway between summer and winter.
Seventeen years ago, I had a dream in which I started a blog called "Oh, By The Way." When I woke up that morning, I went to the computer and promptly started a blog called "Oh, By The Way." Seriously--it was the first thing I did that morning, and yes, I often act out in waking life things I have dreamt.
"Oh, By The Way" is my digital scrap book of things I like, things I would share with a close friend and say: "Oh, by the way, do you know of this artist / clothing or interior designer / model / singer / actor / gorgeous man … or, have you seen this video / photo/ film... or heard (or do you remember) this song / band ... or, read this book / poem / inspiring quote ... or, visited this place / restaurant / famous building ... or, have you heard of this amazing new scientific discovery?"
Followers and regular readers: thank you so much! I hope you find this blog by turns fascinating, beautiful, interesting, moving, inspiring, informative, enriching, and uplifting. Welcome to the birthday party! This year I am virtually serving scoops of Lavender Rose Ice Cream by Elizabeth Labau at SugarHero! Regular readers know that if it tastes like a flower, I will happily eat it ... macarons, shortbread, cake, ice cream, whatever "it" may be. Enjoy!
And now we have lost Duncan Sheik, talented singer-songwriter and Grammy AND Tony winner, who created some lovely songs as well as the genre-changing musical "Spring Awakening." Artists are leaving us at a quicker pace these days...
R.I.P. Duncan, and thanks for all the beautiful music.
I am greatly saddened to hear of the passing of Annie Dillard. Like many people, I approached her work through her Pulitzer Prize-wining book Pilgrim At Tinker Creek. Her writing is so immediate, so visceral, so breathless and urgent in its need to be heard, its need to be understood, but more than anything, for the reader to comprehend and stand dazzled in cosmic disbelief at what she discovered, whatever she pointed us toward.
I went on to read many of her other books like Teaching A Stone To Talk, For The Time Being, and the beautifully tender and painfully exquisite memoir An American Childhood. She wrote words, sentences, concepts, that made me gasp out loud and cry.
Thank you Annie, for sharing your heart and soul with us. You have enriched humanity and you will be missed.
Annie Dillard | Photo: Phyllis Rose
“What does it feel like to be alive?
Living, you stand under a waterfall. You leave the sleeping shore deliberately; you shed your dusty clothes, pick your barefoot way over the high, slippery rocks, hold your breath, choose your footing, and step into the waterfall. The hard water pelts your skull, bangs in bits on your shoulders and arms. The strong water dashes down beside you and you feel it along your calves and thighs rising roughly back up, up to the roiling surface, full of bubbles that slide up your skin or break on you at full speed. Can you breathe here? Here where the force is the greatest and only the strength of your neck holds the river out of your face. Yes, you can breathe even here. You could learn to live like this. And you can, if you concentrate, even look out at the peaceful far bank where you try to raise your arms. What a racket in your ears, what a scattershot pummeling!
It is time pounding at you, time. Knowing you are alive is watching on every side your generation's short time falling away as fast as rivers drop through air, and feeling it hit.”
Creativity is the natural order of life. Life itself is pure creative energy.
An underlying creative force connects all life. There is an in-dwelling force—a universal consciousness—that infuses and links everything like a net, including ourselves.
Opening up to creativity aligns us with that force. When I open myself to my own creativity, I open myself to the universal consciousness’ creativity working within my life.
Human beings are inherently meant to create. I am, myself, a creation. In turn, my purpose is to continue that process by being creative.
Using creative energy is a two-way street. Creativity is the energy that connects me to the universal consciousness. Using it means participating in that shared net, and what I create passes that energy back.
Believing you aren't creative is an illusion. The refusal to create, or the belief that you lack creativity, is a false narrative that runs counter to your true nature.
Exploring creativity opens up new possibilities. When I open myself to exploring what I can make, I open myself to the possibilities within the universal consciousness.
Opening your creative channel brings change. As I open this channel with the universal consciousness, I should expect many gentle but powerful changes in my life.
It is entirely safe to be creative. It is safe to open myself up to greater and greater levels of creativity.
Creative dreams come from a profound source. My creative dreams and yearnings come from a profound source. As I move toward my dreams, I move toward that deep truth.
The defunct band have reissued a vinyl set called "Downside Up," a collection of B-sides, and here is the jaw-dropping "B Side Ourselves." You're welcome.
Wow, a new M83 titled "I Wrote You A Letter" is on the way (released the 25th of this month, 2026!) but meanwhile, we can enjoy this epic new track, "Blister Sunrise," a return to form for Anthony Gonzalez. On his website, he says of the new album, "This record reflects my state of mind over the past few years. I’m deeply disillusioned by the world we’re living in. I wanted something less calculated, more spontaneous. More punk, in a way." Yes Anthony, I think anyone with a head is feeling it...
Happy Labor Day, readers in the United States! This is a holiday that recognizes and honors the American labor movement of the late 19th century and the contributions that workers have made to the strength, prosperity, laws, and well-being of the country.
I believe in the power of labor and work. I believe in the dignity of labor and work. I believe in the power of unions to protect workers from abuse by companies and corporations, and I am a proud union member. Now more than ever in this current political climate, I believe all of these things. I believe in the sense of fairness toward which the human spirit strives. Happy Labor Day!
Standing together with co-workers in a union makes a tangible difference you can feel every day. Here are just a few benefits:
Workers in labor unions make 18% more in wages than our nonunion counterparts.
We are more likely to have health care benefits. More than nine out of 10 union members have access to employer-provided health insurance, compared to 68% of nonunion workers, according to the Department of Labor.
We work in safer workplaces. One study found job sites that were unionized have lost-time claims at a 31% lower rate than non-unionized sites.
We have more job security—even and especially in moments of economic crisis.
Countries where most workers are in a union are among the happiest and healthiest on Earth.
ABBA's song "Dancing Queen" has turned 50 and it still soars. It remains a special song: the production values are unique, the string section is lovely, the ringing piano chords offer a noble counterpoint, and despite the upbeat lyrics the tune is actually somewhat wistful and melancholy. And the glorious, perfectly overlayed vocals and harmonies of singers Agnetha Fältskog and Anni-Frid (Frida) Lyngstad are heart-melting.
East Coast-born artist Mittie Cuetara relocated to the San Francisco Bay Area years ago and now paints scenes of streets, houses, and parks in San Francisco, Oakland, and Berkeley ... views and images of cityscapes and landscapes I know so well! Regular readers know how much I love a painter who really uses paint in a visceral way, creating Impressionistic feelings with globs and swirls of glorious color, and Cuetara does that in a loose, free, masterful way. So beautiful!
"Oh, By The Way" is my digital scrap book of things I like, things I would share with a close friend and say: “Oh, by the way, do you know of this artist/ clothing or interior designer/ model/ singer/ actor/ gorgeous man… or, have you seen this video/ photo/ film... or heard (or do you remember) this song/ band... or, read this book/ poem/ inspiring quote... or, visited this place/ museum/ restaurant/ famous building... or, have you heard of this amazing new scientific discovery?”
I am dedicated to posting the positive, the fascinating, the beautiful, the interesting, the moving, and the inspiring and uplifting. Sometimes I post cultural as well as personal observations, milestones, and remembrances. And just like life, all of these things may often have a bit of melancholy or even sadness in them, which is what makes our time here so lovely and bittersweet and precious.
Some of the photos, art, poetry, and prose are my own original work, credited with my initials, JEF. When it isn't, I always try to post links to the original source material, but often I find photos on the web that are not linked or other material that is not sourced. In these instances, I post them without malice since it is assumed that such things, by being globally posted on something as uncontrollable as the internet to begin with, are in the public domain. If you identify the source of an image that is not linked, please politely let me know (without accusing me of theft, please) and I will be happy to provide a link. If you are the owner of an image and would prefer it be removed, I am happy to do that as well (again, without accusing me of theft, please).
I hope to inspire and entertain my readers with things that inspire and entertain me. There is a startling amount of beauty and creativity in the world and it enriches us all to participate in it.
All-time Favorite Films
2001: A Space Odyssey (Kubrick)
After Hours (Hysterical, hair-raising ride through NYC at night)
Amelie
American Beauty (Alan Ball)
Baraka (Stunning, transcending—the "spiritus mundi" on film)
Belle et Bete (Cocteau)
Big Sleep, The (The epitome of film noir)
Bringing Up Baby (Hepburn & Grant—the epitome of screwball comedy)
Cook, The Thief, His Wife, and Her Lover, The (Greenaway)
Crash (Cronenberg—DIFFICULT subject, not for everyone)
Don’t Look Now (Nicolas Roeg—ultimate modern gothic horror)
Drowning By Numbers (Greenaway)
Easy Rider
Edward II (Derek Jarman)
Erendira (From magic realist Marquez’ brilliant short story)
Eyes Wide Shut (Kubrick's last film)
Fearless (Jeff Bridges—life and death)
Funny Bones (Leslie Caron, Jerry Lewis, and the brilliant Lee Evans)
Holiday (Hepburn & Grant)
Howard’s End (The ultimate statement of the unfairness of class systems)
Hunger, The
Ice Storm, The
Inland Empire (David Lynch)
Interiors (Woody Allen's ode to Bergman)
Jetée, La (French short that inspired Gilliam's "12 Monkeys")
Jules et Jim (Truffaut)
Juliet of the Spirits (My favorite Fellini)
Kwaidan (4 Japanese ghost stories)
L’Age d’Or (Bunuel)
Last Temptation of Christ, The (Jesus was a shaman)
Latcho Drom (Beautiful visual documentary of Romany culture around the world)
Lion in Winter, The (Hepburn!—Like “Who’s Afraid of Virginia Woolf” but circa 1183)
Living End, The
Logan's Run
Lost Highway (David Lynch)
Magnolia
Maurice (Boy gets boy, they live happily ever after!!!!!)
Men Don’t Leave (Jessica Lange’s gorgeous delicate performance)
Mirror, The (achingly beautiful stream of consciousness Tarkovsky)
Nights of Cabiria, The (Fellini)
Orlando (Tilda Swinton’s pristine performance and Sally Potter’s ravishing visuals)
Orphée (HEAVEN! Cocteau was a genius)
Pennies From Heaven (Steve Martin/ stunning Edward Hopper sets!)
Philadelphia Story, The (Hepburn)
Pillow Book, The (Greenaway)
Planet of the Apes (1968...NOT 2001!)
Postman Always Rings Twice, The (Nicholson/Lange--WOW)
Prospero’s Books (Greenaway)
Rebel Without a Cause ("I got the bullets!")
Satyricon (Fellini)
Shining, The (Kubrick)
Solaris (atmospheric, haunting Andrei Tarkovsky sci-fi)
Stalker (chilling Andrei Tarkovsky sci-fi)
Thin Red Line, The (Terrence Malick--existential poetry cleverly disguised as a war film)
Titus (Julie Taymor does Shakespeare)
Tommy (Brilliant, audacious Ken Russell film of The Who's rock opera)
Tree Of Life, The (Terrence Malick masterpiece)
Un Chien Andalou (Bunuel and Dali, need more be said?)
Wall,The (Pink Floyd)
Wings of Desire (All the feelings of the entire human race in one film)
Woman of the Year (Dated yet charming Hepburn vehicle)
Zabriskie Point (Empty, open, classic early 70s)
ZOO, A Zed and Two Noughts (Greenaway)
The Sounds My Soul Makes: Music
Annie Lennox
Brian Eno
Cocteau Twins
David Bowie
David Sylvian
Dead Can Dance
Durutti Column
Elbow
Everything But the Girl
Gang of Four
Gem Club
Goldfrapp
Joni Mitchell
José González
Junip
Kate Bush
Laurie Anderson
M83
Morrissey
Nine Inch Nails
Peter Gabriel
Peter Murphy
Rickie Lee Jones
Sigur Ros
Simple Minds
Smiths, The
Sufjan Stevens
Talk Talk
Tears For Fears
This Mortal Coil
Tori Amos
Ultravox
William Orbit
Zero 7
Important Books That Have Influenced Me
100 Years of Solitude—Gabriel Garcia Marquez
A Wrinkle in Time, A Wind in the Doorway (for young people but worth it)—Madeleine L’Engle
